


A Self Destructor

by gabriels_heresy



Category: The Glass Scientists (Webcomic)
Genre: Basic Angst, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-23
Updated: 2017-04-23
Packaged: 2018-10-23 05:57:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10713591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gabriels_heresy/pseuds/gabriels_heresy
Summary: Financial stress and the plethora of mental illnesses pushes Henry to make a fatefull decision.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Possible triggers  
> \- suicide attempt  
> \- cutting  
> \- blood 
> 
> "I am not wishing to romanticise suicide in anyway, I am simply exploring how these characters might respond to the situation."

Jekyll sat alone in his office, hunched over his desk of scattered papers, searching ever desperately for funds which did not exist. Alone with his thoughts of impending financial ruin and the doomed fates of those within the society. Alone with Hyde, who drifted in and out of peripheral vision in undulating shades of green; nagging and chiding Jekyll over his trivial desires and requests. Pleading for excitement. Begging for adventure.  
“Just let me have the evening, Henry.” The echo of Hyde's incessant whining ricocheted about his already crowded mind.  
“What part of this needs to be done before the end of the week don't you understand?,”Jekyll bursted out with a slam of a fist, papers slid off the desk and scattered about the floor. He rubbed at his raw, tender eyes and whimpered,”I can't fail everyone now…”  
Hyde scoffed and appeared across the room in a hazy mirror,”I doubt you'll even see the end of the week if I don't go out and ‘blow of steam’”, he gave a sly sneer, a shrug and dissipated into darkness once more. Jekyll rested his head upon the desk and allowed the statement to run through his mind.  
“What did he… I … mean by that?”, he closed his eyes and let out a heavy sigh,”I see now… that terrible question which has floated round my mind for years now… to sleep, to die, to sleep perchance to dream…” he sat up from the table and breathed, “aye; there’s the rub.” That question of life or death had sat in the darkest corners of Jekyll's mind since his teens, but only in recent years had it ever entered the centre stage. The impending and utter failure of the society had pushed it forward further still. 

Jekyll stood from his desk; meaning to take some fresh air to clear that thought of self destruction. But the sudden apparition of Hyde before him bared his way. He had a look of concern upon his face but, realising this, concealed it with a scowl.  
“I really think you should let me out for a while.” Jekyll let loose a quiet “heh” at this; Hyde honestly thought that he was going to act upon those thoughts… But then again… Jekyll felt he could not quite trust himself completely. His minor acts of self destruction had worsened of late after all.  
“Perhaps I should…” Jekyll said as he glanced back at the stacks of papers. That mountain of stress and strife.  
“Finally”, Hyde sighed as he drifted once more to void. But as Jekyll looked towards that glass cabinet of secrets, that terrible idea bounded once more to the forefront of his mind. 

His hands trembled with fatigue as he concocted the mixture. Such a familiar routine acted upon so many a time that he fell into a daze as he watched the chemicals combine and churn in the flask; the light of the room around him seemed to shift with the hues. As he reached for the flask a sliver of silver glinted in the corner of his eye. The blade of a letter opener. Glinting in light cracking from the curtain. A compulsion seized him, not a compulsion of hyde but something deeper, darker. Darker than hyde. He took the blade up and twirled it about his hand; it was small and deceptively heavy, but razor sharp. A smirk spread across Jekyll's sullen face. A twinkl entered his eyes,  
“Excitement ay?... How about this.”, he placed the blade across his lower arm, vertical amongst faint horizontal lines and… Slashed. He winced at the burning pain and watched as the blood bloomed from the wound in viscous tendrils, like a creature crawling out from within. And then, it fell like a sheet. He turned to grab the flask but something willed him to stop. Every fibre of his body screamed for him to grab it, grab it and allow Hyde to deal with the pain and the wound. But something stronger held him. That force which whispered ideas of destruction. And dreams of freedom. As he gazed at the crimson plume spilling down his fingertips a voice began shrieking,  
“Jekyll what the fuck have you done?!”, Hyde grabbed his arm but could do nothing to stem the flow in his hallucinated state,”Aren’t you going to drink the mixture?”, his voice was desperate and charged with fear.  
“Perhaps this is for the best…”, Jekyll whispered as he collapsed into his chair, his right hand over the slash. The pain had dulled to a tingle but the blood continued to flow with increasing violence and spread across the floor, staining papers with its deathly touch. 

Jekyll's eyes flickered and dulled with every drop that left him. Death was all Hyde feared. He had to convince Jekyll to treat the wound before it was too late. He searched through their minds for something to convince him with,  
“Jekyll listen,” he grabbed him by the shoulder,”You don't really want to die… We’re the same person right? And I don't want to die so neither do you!”  
“What does it matter… You’re supposed to not want death… You’re just an animalistic and evil side of myself…”, Jekyll mumbled,”...I want you dead.”  
“Bastard!” Hyde yelled in his face. Nothing was going to stop him. The society was doomed no matter what happened. He had not felt a strong desire of affection in anything bar his work for years, but even that had stagnated in recent months from lack of funds. He felt so little anymore that he truly believed this was the only sensible option. Hyde sunk back into Jekyll's mind, dread rising as the seconds dripped from his arm. 

One final and desperate thought entered Hyde's own mind. He had to take control of Jekyll's body. He had tried many a time in the past but with no success. However, in this emotional and weak state, it might be possible. Jekyll had passed out, his consciousness slipping further and further from the light. Hyde focused intently upon the body that he considered rightfully his own. As Jekyll fell into darkness Hyde’s took his place. In dribs and drabs Hyde could feel himself taking over. Taking in all the sensations and feelings of Jekyll's body… the exhaustion, the hunger, the pain. Hyde screamed out as the wound became reality. He gripped at the gaping slash thinking of what to do now. He tugged at the loose tie around his neck and, fighting back the encroaching sleep of death, tied a tourniquet around his arm, the already slowed flow of blood grew stiller. Hyde tried to stand. But the faint body and blood that now soaked between the floorboards caused him to fall. He could feel the approach of death. His body cold. His breath shallow. But he found the will to continue. The will to live. To live for both he and Jekyll. Hyde began to crawl towards the large set of doors across the room. His left arm pressed against his chest. A trickling trail of blood in his wake. 

Hyde pulled himself up by the door handle, pulled it inward and stumbled into the corridor. The rush of cool air and light picked him up once more and he yelled out,  
“Help, someone please… help...”, as he sunk to the floor once more. And with that final burst of energy, Hyde felt himself slip away. But it was not the end. A hand grabbed his shoulder. His eyes flickered briefly. Lanyon had found him, he too was calling for help but turned and asked,  
“Henry...why…?”


	2. Chapter 2

Jekyll woke to the sensation of cool air and chemicals. His eyes crept open and found himself in his own bedroom. Distant voices mumbled incoherently about the room. Colours and light fazed together to a blur. He made an attempt to sit up but his body felt like led. One of the voices broke free from the mumbles,  
“Henry, you’re awake!”, Lanyon leaned over him, his eyes bright with anticipation,”You'd lost so much blood I wasn't sure if you would ever wake up…”, he sat at the edge of the bed. Jekyll blinked into focus and said,  
“I'm surprised myself…” His voice was coarse with dehydration,”I'm sorry Robert… I'm so sorry…” He turned his head, biting back tears that now stung in his eyes. Lanyon placed his hand upon Jekyll's,  
“If you were in trouble why didn't you talk to me?”  
“I could hardly comprehend my own emotions… I didn't know what to do… And it felt like such a good idea at the time…” Jekyll laughed at his own words. Articulating what was going through his mind was near impossible. Lanyon must have understood this as he stood from the bed and said softly,  
“I'll let you rest…”, he made to leave the room. With the click of the closing latch the light of the room shifted to shadow. 

Hyde stood at the beds foot, a venomous glare upon his face.   
“You owe me both a thank you and an apology… you stupid bastard.” Jekyll screwed his eyes shut and whispered  
“I can't and won't deal with you right now… leave me be.” Hyde growled,  
“You would be dead without me right now… I'd change that tone of your’s.” Jekyll opens his eyes and looked towards his other self.   
“You’re right… I'm sorry… and thank you.” Hyde’s glare faded and nodded in acknowledgment,  
“I'll leave you be now… I can't do anything with you being in this state.”, he dissolved with the shadows as light returned. Jekyll had no clue what Hyde had demanded a thank you for. He pondered this as he fell into sleep.

Jekyll slept for some time and awaked to find Lanyon in his room once more. He was changing the wounds dressing, Jekyll could see many neat stitches and the yellow stain of iodine stretched across his arm.   
“A good job you did there my friend… But I’m sure the scar will never fade.” Jekyll attempted to make light of the situation. Lanyon sighed, “If you had cut any straighter we wouldn't be having this conversation… Henry… I want you to promise me something.”  
“What is it?”  
“If you ever, and I mean ever, have any inclination to do this again please come talk to me…”  
“I promise…”   
Lanyon finished tying the dressing, a smirk suddenly appeared on his lips,  
“When I found you I noticed the strangest things… I swear that before you passed out your eyes… They were the most dazzling green… Isn't that odd?” Realisation spread through Jekyll's mind like a fire. Hyde had wanted thanks for saving him from himself. Or was it simply selfie preservation? Jekyll could not tell nor did he care for the time being. But he whispered thank you once more.


End file.
